I can't believe a stranger did this for me

The Kasol-Kheerganga expedition began with "hey these are the people you are going to be with for the next three days, enjoy". Imagine you pick an introvert out of sleep and make him stand in front of billion strangers (read 60, still apocalyptic okay). How do you talk to random people? The maximum "talking to strangers" prowess I show is replying a comment on my blog or instagram. But I like to stretch out of my comfort zone. Climbing a mountain, staging a stand-up comedy act is within but talking to a stranger is not in my comfort zone.

Out of my solemn comfort zone, instead of mountains, rivers, sculptures, I talked to people. I could not understand them like they spoke Mandarin and I know only Hebrew. Then I saw what they did, and I started pulling my hair. People say and do things they do not need to. How beautiful that is! Doing things you do not need to. Doing things because you wish to. When was the last time you did that? 

Going to the mountains

Ola driver takes a trip without the passenger, gets epic response

18th March 2015, ​I checked the fare estimate from Bangalore Airport to Whitefield, ola app showed "Rs. 361- Rs. 404". I put Rs.599 in my ola money. I got charged Rs.872. This wastwice what it was supposed to be. I was not even carrying cash, then I had to run to the ATM to withdraw cash. I would have booked an Uber had I known that the fare is going to be Rs. 872.

That day I uninstalled my Ola app and pledged over the sun, the moon and the planet earth to never ever travel again.

On the twenty ninth day of June, I wished to embark on journey to Swaminarayan Akshardham temple. I looked for an Uber, but unfortunately had none in vicinity. After denying a hundred times, I gave in to the temptation and installed Ola again.

Ola Micro was 2 minutes away. I went to my home's mandir and did that "bhagwan ne meri sun lee". I added Rs. 400 to Ola Money. I booked cab, waited for 15 minutes, none came. I called the driver.

I: I booked an ola. Kahan ho aap?
Driver: Bhai mai te SHE ENN JEE ki laain me laag raa su
I: Bhaiya kitna time lagega
Driver: bhai bera na time te laagega
I: fir aap cancel kar do, mai doosri cab dekh leta hun
Driver: theek hai bhai

After 10 minutes, thankfully I got an Uber and booked it khataak se. :)

As I was picking up my bag, my phone beeped. See picture. "Thanks for travelling with us, Gaurav" - Ola. 

Ola Fraud


And that moment, my friend, changed my life forever.

I never knew I had dual existence. Like I exist in my home and ola cab as well. Is it gaurav from the future/past or ram aur shaam or seeta aur geeta. Am I Schrodinger's cat, I think I am at home but I am in ola cab.

Post reading the ola email, my dog has started having trust issues. He thinks I am a behrupia, trying to steal his bone. He has dug the entire lawn 10 feet deeper to hide it.

Thanks to which my neighbors think that I have murdered his crush Lucy the bitch because she is from a different caste, and burying the body in the lawn. They were on dharna since morning asking for justice until the police beat the hell out of them thinking they were from AAP.

My manager at office has fired me as a jealous colleague informed him I am sowing luxury level arhar ki daal in my dug up lawn while bringing only karela in office lunch.

I have asked Mummy a hundred times, if I have a judwa bhai jo kumbh ke mele me bichhad gya tha. To which she says "bete 7 janm ke paap hote hain 14 ke nahi".

My dad is searching for the other Gaurav, thinking "kya pata wo isse better model ho".

I woke up from a nightmare aghast because I saw my future kid running in langot screaming "mere do do baap, mere do do baap" like in Suniel Shetty's Gopi Kishan.

I could not take this severe identity crisis. I was about to commit suicide, but then the Insurance company called up.

Insurance wale uncle: Guraav saar, what's up?
I: nothing much. Just suicide.
He: Arre saar cancel kar do. kilaim nahi milega aapko.
I: Why? Away from earthquake, floods, riots, acts of God, and 140 other non-covered dying options written in 3pt font size on page 337 of the policy, I am dying the perfect death consuming Patanjali Shudh desi cyanide.
He: Arre saar. Aap two people hain, premium one ka dete ho. Ya to ushko bhi saath me lo, ya fir muh me lo rasogulla or cancel karo.

Dear Ola,

Keep all my money.
Meri neend mera chain mujhe lauta do,
aur mujhe doosre Gaurav se mila do.
I am sure none as cute as me ever existed on this planet unless it is another me.
Looking forward to hear from you.
CRN288374984.

I had given one star rating and expressed my concern in the feedback form regarding this fraud but to no avail. 
Hope this grabs your attention.

Regards,
Gaurav Arora ( I )


What to do when bored? - Poem

Time and again, we find ourselves caught up in routine. You go to school everyday, create presentations everyday, cook everyday, or do anything everyday, everyday makes it boring and terrible. You start hating it. You start missing semicolons, become irritable, add extra salt, misplace important documents because your mind is tired and uninterested in the routine. If I drop an ice cube in your shirt, you do a reflex action. If you stay put for 1 minute, your body would no longer react as badly. That's the thing with routine, your mind and body start developing blind spots. You do things but your mind is virtually absent.

It is your responsibility to give your mind and body "the new" not everyday but every now and then. It keeps you and all your senses awake. It could be white water rafting, rock climbing, selling your artwork in the street, talking to a random person in a park, cooking the cuisine you never did, playing a sport you never did, wearing something you never did. Being crazy, being silent, being solo, being in a group, being opposite of what you are, what you always do. 

I had a terrible desk job.where I worked 12 hours everyday. The cafeteria was at 10th floor. One day I went to the cafeteria window after looking at my computer screen for 9 hours. I could see mountains around the horizon, and I felt pain in my forehead. A weird pain, maybe because my eyes had become habitual of not seeing beyond the screen 30 inches away. It felt great looking 30 km off, the pain soothed the senses somehow. 

Shades, hills, clouds en route hogenakkal falls tamil nadu
Hills, clouds, and a new view, en route Hogenakkal Falls, Tamil Nadu

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